Cracked nipples. Mastitis. Breast pads. I left out all the gory details when I discussed this topic on breakfast radio this morning. I wanted to talk about breastfeeding today because some new research has come out looking at the public health impacts of early weaning. 90% of 35 – 45 year olds were weaned before 6 months, and that’s impacted our overall health as a nation.
One reason for early weaning today is women returning to work, but the other is that there’s not enough breastfeeding support and expertise in the general community. Before I breastfed my daughter I’d never seen anybody attach a baby. We’ve lost that communal passing on of knowledge. I know a few mothers who chose not to breastfeed because they didn’t like the idea of it. I think the sexualisation of our culture is partly to blame – young women just aren’t used to thinking of their breasts as a functional piece of equipment for feeding.
Personally I had a positive experience of breastfeeding. I absolutely loved it. I loved the closeness and the bonding – the skin on skin contact with my baby. But, I also remember one phase at about six months where I got sick of it and wanted to quit. Sometimes I felt like I did nothing else for that entire year. But fortunately I never had any problems with my milk supply – actually I had so much milk I felt I should be bottling it.
So what made breastfeeding work for me? I don’t think there was any one thing, but some things that helped were:
- I found out as much as I could before I gave birth. They ran a breastfeeding course at my hospital and I did it twice – once before I gave birth and then again afterwards. I’d really recommend that to anyone who’s having their first baby or who’s wanting to breastfeed for the first time.
- When I was in hospital I rang for the midwife every time I fed to make sure I had her attached correctly. If you don’t get a good attachment then you can really do some damage and it affects your confidence as well. I think it’s really important to get as much help as you can in the first few days.
- I also asked lots of dumb questions. Every midwife has a slightly different opinion on how often you should feed, whether to wake your baby, how long to feed for, but the more you ask, the more you learn how to make those decisions yourself.
- Also I had a goal for how long I wanted to breastfeed and I was determined not to introduce bottles until I was ready to wean. So many Mums I knew were disappointed when their milk dried up after a few months, but they’d been substituting breastfeeds with bottles and then their milk supply dropped. So don’t substitute or supplement with formula until you’re ready to wean (unless of course your baby’s starving. That’s a different kettle of fish!)
People have very different ideas about how long to breastfeed for. I don’t actually have a strong view on when is the right time to wean. In terms of health benefits, the first 6 months are the most important. But extending breastfeeding does extend the health benefits. My goal was to breastfeed for 12 months, because that’s when you can introduce cows’ milk. So I started weaning at 12 months and had her totally weaned by 14 months. That felt natural to me because that was when Birdy started walking and it was a clear time of transition from baby to toddler. But some babies just wean themselves and there’s nothing you can do about it. Finally, I think it’s valid to consider the mother’s social, physical and mental needs when deciding when to wean. After all, it takes two people to breastfeed! Both parties have to be happy with the situation.
PS. I received a wise piece of advice once. When you meet an adult, you can’t tell whether they were breastfed or not! So if, with all your best efforts, it didn’t work out, don’t stress too much!
Did you breastfeed your babies? Was it easy for you or did it take practice and persistence? At what age did you wean and why? Would you have preferred to breastfeed for longer? Did you breastfeed in public or were you too embarrassed?
cecily
baby 1 weaned at 5 months by herself. Baby 2 weaned at 2.5 years by himself. Baby 3 weaned at 4 years and 3 months (I kid you not) by himself. “I’m too old for this mum.” yep- you got that right. Only because I couldn’t be bothered weaning him earlier. Who knows what baby 4 will do… but the best tip for running out of milk is to stuff your face with food and drink for 24 hours and stay in bed and let the baby suck all she wants. Works every time.
Jennzy
Breastfed all 3. Was so hard for first 6 wks for all 3 – cracked nipples – last baby sucked a hole out of one!!! Man it was agony! But i persevered coz i wanted to breastfeed – thought it will be worth it in the long run, rather than sterilising bottles and all that. But it was so much more worth all that. I too loved the contact and looking down on this baby whose life I was sustaining and ohhhhh this is why i have boobs and this is why its good to be a woman!
For my 1st baby – a friend came to visit when baby was 2m and she made me go out in public and we sat in a cafe and she got me to feed to get used to it and so i wouldn’t be trapped at home! Best thing that ever happened. I remember sometime after that, answering the door whilst feeding and the guy who came to fix something nearly died of shock – ha ha. You could NEVER see anything when i fed coz I wore baggy shirts but yeah it became natural.
Weaned No. 1 when at 1 she started pointing to my boobs in front of others and saying milk! I was so embarrassed and went right … you are getting weaned. She was done by 15m. And i guess i had a goal at least till 1 so they could then go on cows milk. 2nd baby i weaned by 13m because she was sucking so much out of me i felt weak/dizzy all the time. But she wouldn’t drink cows milk so i was most upset and felt like i did the wrong thing with her. I put her on lactose free milk and she liked that. Then finally went to cows milk. 3rd one i weaned at 18m. I didn’t want to wean him coz it would be my last time. My sister thought him too old ha ha. But he weaned himself when we went to Syd for my brothers wedding – with everything going on he didn’t ask. And i thought it best to take the opportunity to finish it. He was mostly weaned bar one feed then. He also wouldn’t go to cows milk and drank 1/2 juice 1/2 water and still does and funnily enough i bought lactose free milk for my oldest’s friend who is allergic to lactose and he LOVED it! Hmmm. Anyway, that’s another conversation! Back to breastfeeding – i HATED being born a woman – until i had my first child! Then i was very grateful to be able to have that experience of feeding and giving birth!
katrinaroe
Jennzy, I agree. There’s something about that amazing experience of giving birth and feeding that makes it all worth while.
Merryn
I breastfed my 1st to 13 months. Her pediatrician said breastfeeding as long as possible would have her the best chance of not inheriting my asthma or hubby’s hayfever. I was a bit worried at that – asked, you mean until 2? 3? He laughed and said breastfeeding that long might do more harm than good, but to aim for 1. Which we did!
With my 2nd I was tempted to bottle feed by 2 weeks as I felt nauseous constantly. But I remembered how much I loved breastfeeding my 1st, and how I was so sad when she had her last feed. My mum arrived then and got me eating proper meals and drinking loads of water – by 4 weeks the nausea was gone. And I’m loving breastfeeding again!! So glad I didn’t give up.
My breastfeeding tips;
- Eat and drink LOTS, especially at first. If your baby seems colicky in the evening try drinking lots of water in the afternoons. Worked for me.
- Avoid caffeine. (This after my first caff coffee today since he was born … and my 7wk old has slept only 3 hours all day!)
- Ask for help. Find out how to get in touch with a lactation consultant / midwife before the baby is born, so you know where to go if you have problems or questions.
Aly
Interesting, Mezz. I often drank coffee or tea between feeds with Tobin and it didn’t noticeably keep him awake. BUT he’s never been as LONG a sleeper in the day as El was, so I wonder if I’ve created that? Maybe I set those patterns for him early on if he was awakened by caffeine kicking in after a delay or something.
Glad to hear your Mum ‘mothered’ you so much and that things are so much better now!
Merryn
Hi Aly.. had a coffee in the mornings with Rosie and she was ok … maybe because I avoided it for 7 weeks then tried one Sam reacted. Maybe it’s ok if you’ve been drinking it through pregnancy too … or maybe all babies have different reactions to the ‘legal addictive stimulant’!
Jennzy
wow interesting Merryn that your caffeine affected the baby – but of course – but WHY didn’t i ever think of that!!! AND the water re: colick! Amazing! This is why it’s good that women share – although i no longer need the information! Although i guess i can pass it onto others
Interesting re: hayfever/asthma – did it work for you? I had my 1st on till 15m and she has allergies, breathing issues, etc. Didn’t seem to work for her!
katrinaroe
Yes, in my family the asthma/allergies is topsy turvy. My older sister wasn’t breastfed, she was fed carnation milk (from a tin!) and she has no asthma or allergies. My younger sister and I were breastfed, she gets terrible asthma and I get awful hayfever! Also Birdy has dreadful asthma, hayfever, eczema and food allergies and she was breastfed for 13 months. Maybe she’d be even worse if she wasn’t breastfed, who knows?
Re colicky in the evenings, I also found that extra time spent burping seemed to help. I think sometimes the tummy gets full of air and they can’t get enough milk in! (Does that sound like an old wives tale?)
Merryn, I also think you’ve got a great point with good meals and water. Breastfeeding mums needs lots of good healthy food and plenty of water, NOT stodgy, processed, salty foods!
Re caffeine: I don’t normally drink coffee, but one time at uni I ordered a decaf coffee but saw the barista run it off with all the others. I knew it wasn’t decaf but drank it anyway. That night after her ‘dreamfeed’ Birdy was awake for hours from 10pm til 1pm. Never again!
Jennzy
no to the old wives tale! and interesting re: maybe they’d be worse – let’s tell ourselves that
he he
tricia
I breastfed all my 3 babies and loved it! I weaned my eldest when I got pregnant again. He was about 14 months so it wasn’t early, but I think he would have enjoyed it for much longer than that. The other 2 were breastfed for a similar length of time – about 15 mths.
I think one of the most important things is the determination to succeed. There are a lot of different problems that mums and babies can face, so you need to have decided before the baby is born that you are going to persist.
Apart from the benefits to the baby and mother, breastfeeding is so much cheaper!!
Smitch
Here’s my story….
All three of my kids were breastfed… but having said that, they did not survive on breastmilk.
My #1 was a traumatic birth, and probably moreso afterwards which I attribute a lot to the failure of my milk to “come in”… 2 days after his birth I was sitting alone in a cubicle in the emergency department of one hospital in tears while he was at another hospital – can’t say that would have helped much! But anyway, we persevered with all the advice given by midwives and lactation consultants, and thought we were doing ok (expressing, pumping, eating, drinking, resting etc etc) – he was being supplemented with small amounts of formula, monitored by the early childhood nurses etc…. he would often scream after a feed and being a new mum I thought that was normal, but I was able to settle him and he ended up sleeping through the night at 8 weeks (he totally disproves the theory that food makes a baby sleep through the night!) ….. but turns out things weren’t going well…. looking back at photos now he was pale, gaunt and skinny… he wasn’t getting enough, not putting on weight, not thriving… so we had to increase the amount of formula he was getting… I persevered feeding him from breast and bottle every feed for 5 months. Exhausting!
baby #2… we were told that my low milk supply wouldn’t happen again, that it was a one off with #1….. not so…. I was determined not to give him a bottle, determined not to give him formula…. he was born on the largeish size (4.2kg) …. ended up getting blood group related jaundice… so was in the special care with all these tiny tiny babies…. no milk came…. not even any colostrum…. once again I was on the pump trying my best…. had some nightmareish midwives with unhelpful comments… ended up going on Motillium about 4 days after birth… this started to help… but he had lost too much weight so the paediatrician said he had to go on formula… once again we were supplementing every breastfeed with a bottle…. still tried the pumping, expressing, etc etc etc but no joy… I lasted 4 months with him doing both before the exhaustion set in and I had to succumb to full bottle feeds…
Baby #3… I was scared that it wouldn’t work once again, but I was determined to try… she was a much smaller baby which helped I think… she didn’t have to be in special care… so the start we had was better… but still… on about day 2 or 3 she had lost too much weight, her lips were all dry and cracked due to dehydration, and she wasn’t a happy girl… the paediatrician said once again that she needed to be supplemented with formula… I started the Motillium a few days earlier and my milk started appearing but still not enough. Out of the 3, she did receive more breastmilk from me than formula, and we were able to cope with just supplementing her a small amount for a couple of months, and even some feeds she just had breastmilk… but still, without any formula she wouldn’t have survived. I lasted just over 6 months with her, and by then doing breast, then bottle, then solids just seemed crazy, there was no time to play, and still so exhausting.
I had the determination, and I persisted, and still things didn’t work out. I never had the “let down” feeling, I never had leaks, I never had the feeling of fullness…. Personally I get upset and frustrated with women who are able to breastfeed without trouble but choose not to. I guess it’s because I wish I had that choice. Breastfeeding is so much cheaper and less time consuming. The “breast is best” campaign bothers me though because I think mothers also need to be reassured that formula is not evil, and that not breastfeeding does not mean your child’s IQ will be lower etc etc etc. What also frustrates me is the, often well meaning, advice given by mothers who haven’t had any trouble breastfeeding. The “if you do this, that, and the other then it’ll work” advice…. because it doesn’t always. As with everything and especially when it’s to do with conception, pregnancy, birth, child-rearing etc – what works for one person does not mean it’ll always work for another.
I know and understand that I am blessed and fortunate that I am able to have children and that I haven’t had to grieve the loss of a child…. and everyone’s experience is different… I guess I couldn’t work out why it made me feel so miserable until one maternal health professional told me that not being able to breastfeed is something that can cause grief…. and I do grieve the inability to feed my children as God intended, I find it a really difficult subject, and even now it’s making me teary…. people may think that its silly because “at least I have healthy kids” but that doesn’t change the emotions around it….
Now… baby #4 is due next month… I’m once again determined to breastfeed…. so I guess we’ll see what happens…. I have often commented that I’m going to keep having kids until I can feed them… but I think this may be the last – so hopefully the feeding will work.
PS.. as to allergies etc… mine have none despite always having formula.
Tricia
Wow, you are going to try again! I’m not sure I would, with all those issues and 3 children to care for. Best wishes for every success.
Jennzy
Glad you shared Smitch – I have quite a few friends who couldn’t breastfeed and not for lack of trying, like you. They used to joke about the breastfeeding nazi brigade! Babies need food … no matter where they get it! Glad you listened to your doc and trusted him. We have a friend who is a nurse and she gets mad as anything about all these “natural” mums who swear you can only give birth naturally (no caesers) and only breastfeed etc etc. and she says aaaghh medically we’ve advanced and ppl are still living in the dark ages and there are deaths that shouldn’t happen and do because of ppl like this! She’s not ANTI these things – but anti that it is the ONLY way, rather than getting a good health professional and then trusting them, despite what you want/desire etc. And NB: re: allergies .. i was a formula baby and had allergies and passed on allergies to my daughter who was breastfed – here’s a thought – maybe it’s genetic and has nothing to do with the boobs!
katrinaroe
Hey Smitch, Thanks for sharing your story. I can totally understand why it would make you emotional and that there would be feelings of grief and loss. Because you’ve lost the chance to experience ‘joy’ and satisfaction in breastfeeding and instead have experienced frustration, exhaustion and powerlessness. You’ve been robbed of the ‘wonderful experience’ that people rave on about. (This is how I feel about pregnancy. I just can’t enjoy it and it irritates me when people attribute their perfect pregnancies to their good diet or yoga or whatever.) Also when we are full-time Mums then it becomes such a big part of our identity and we all want to feel successful at what we are doing.
However, you have breastfed all your babies, and the first 3 months are the most important so you can be proud that you persisted against all the odds and all your kids have received the benefits of breast milk.
Just today, I’ve been thinking back over my hospital experience. I remember crying after my second ever feed. A particular midwife insisted that I had to feed football style. I just wanted to get the hang of one position first. But she said, “No, you can’t just feed in one position all the time. You have to learn more than one way.” Well I was stressed out, Birdy was stressed out, she didn’t feed and I had to give her a syringe of colostrum. I felt like a failure. Fortunately that midwife was never on duty again, and I only ever fed in one position from that day on. I also remember being told by one midwife all the reasons why I probably wouldn’t be able to breastfeed. My nipples were too flat, maybe even inverted and my skin was too sensitive so I’d probably bleed and crack. It was like she was setting me up to fail. Fortunately another midwife showed me how to express a little before I put her on the breast to make it easier for her. I never had any problems once I knew how to do that. And I never once had problems with my so-called sensitive skin. But I did have problems with my confidence in the first few days after the midwives told me all the reasons why I wouldn’t be able to feed. Midwives need to realise how fragile first time mums are right after birth!
Smitch I really hope that #4 goes well and that you are surrounded by encouaging people who will support you, whatever happens.
A Badenhop
I was very blessed not have much trouble breastfeeding, either with supply or cracked nipples. I attribute much of the ease I had with attachment to the love of my sister taking the time to show me how she breastfed her daughter before my child was born. She showed me what good attachment looked like and gave me lots of good breastfeeding tips, which helped to demystify the whole thing. Since then, I’ve tried to pass that on to a few friends who have been expecting. Normally a fairly modest person, I feel a little weird showing people my breasts to do this, but I think if you can help make those early weeks of breastfeeding a little less painful for someone else, its worth it.
Thankfully, I didn’t have any of the supply issues that Smitch has shared. I have noticed a difference though when I get slack with drinking enough water (and that this also affects how tired and grumpy I am as well!)
A Badenhop
Oh, there was also a time when my first child didn’t put on any weight in her second month which I attributed to not keeping up the water and her just not being likely to maintain the size she came out at anyway. Even though thats only a teeny tiny taste of what it must feel like for you Smitch and others who have trouble feeding, I know that it kind of strikes at the core of your identity as a mother. After all, in those early weeks, life is really reduced to the basics, and with all those hormones etc, its hard to feel like you can’t do what supposed to be able to as a mother (make your baby grow). It sure sounds like you have put in a mammoth effort Smith – wow! Hope it goes a bit better this next time….
Aly
Interesting, what you said Treen about the pessimistic midwives affecting your confidence, because I’ve also heard many friends of mine say “Man, no one told me it would be that hard! I thought it would come naturally!”
I think for some people, the shock of finding that it DOESN’T come naturally can also affect their confidence and make them feel they’re just not cut out for breastfeeding.
I guess we need a balance of having realistic expectations of possible difficulties but also being equipped with support and various strategies to help us overcome them if we possibly can.
As for me, I heard about the potential difficulties of breastfeeding in antenatal classes, but was still naively optimistic that it would come easily to me and my baby. NOT SO.
My first born daughter refused to attach for 3 weeks! I have an idea now of why this may have happened…
- She was tiny and just not that interested in attaching from the start.
- I, too, had the flat nipple issue (and eventually found, like Treen, that expressing a bit before trying to attach her made it easier for her to get a grip)
- She was born just 3 days before Christmas and I was keen to leave hospital on Christmas Eve, even though attachment hadn’t happened yet. When I did leave, it was Christmas! Family were all around and I wanted to be with them, letting them get to know our new baby, rather than off in the bedroom by myself for hours having skin to skin contact with her. It already took over an hour each feed as I tried to attach her for a while, then bottle fed her, then expressed for the next time.
- While most midwives in the hospital had advised me to feed her the expressed colostrum/milk through an eye dropper, one had given it to her in a bottle. I saw how easily El had taken it and kept doing it that way myself. Problem was, I didn’t realise that while the bottle in the hospital had a newborn teat with one hole for a slow flow, the hand-me-down ones I had at home had FOUR holes.
I was later told by a lactation consultant that sucking from a bottle only uses about 4 muscles in a baby’s face, while sucking from the breast uses about 40. No wonder she didn’t attach – she couldn’t be bothered working for it!
Anyway, FINALLY I went to a free Health Clinic and saw a WONDERFUL lactation consultant. The best thing she did was give me lots of support, affirmation and encouragement. She assured me that yes, my baby WAS the most stubborn 10 day old she’d ever seen and that NO, I didn’t need to stress if it didn’t work out because we’re fortunate enough to have great alternatives to breast milk in our country. But she also marvelled at my amazing milk supply and praised my technique.
She worked out a step by step plan with me (like purchasing a new bottle with a peristaltic teat that’s harder to suck and using silicon nipple shields when trying to attach to make me more like a bottle so El could get a grip and then sneaking them away once she was in a rythm). She celebrated every small success with me along the way (“Yes! She attached for a whole minute!!! Let’s break out the champagne!” – not literally of course) and even invited me to call her on her mobile to check in, even though she was going on holidays.
Around this time I also attended an ABA meeting and had some helpful advice there. In particular, the encouragement to have lots of skin to skin time. The girls said I should make the most of it – hire out my favourite movies, etc, and just lay around the house half naked with her on my chest as much as possible!
Must acknowledge too, a very supportive husband who helped wherever he could and gave lots of encouragement and (attempted) understanding.
I was so glad when El progressed to feeding from the breast with nipple shields, and then ECSTATIC when she finally went straight to the breast! So easy! So fast! So convenient!!! (after all those hours of locking myself away with her, expressing, sterilising bottles, etc). I realised that there had also been an emotional element for me where I had actually felt a bit rejected, and I really did find breastfeeding her to be a bonding experience. Just lovely. Started weaning her at 12 months and all done by about 14 months.
Baby #2 – my son – had NO trouble attaching. He just ripped me to shreds! Because I’d had to express all that time for Elora I could visually SEE how much she was drinking when it was in the bottle, so I never had to wonder if she was getting enough or how long I should let her feed for. Also, she tended to stop herself when she was full.
My son, on the other hand, LOVED to suck and would just go as long as I let him (and then puke it up all over the place). I’m sorry to say that in those first couple of days I was letting him feed for way too long (thinking he’d stop when he had enough) – even 1.5 hours once! That did some major damage. I kept checking in with some consultants at our new local health clinic (we moved 2 days after his birth) and they assured me that his attachment was fine. One of them told me that research suggests that some babies just have a suck that’s up to 40% stronger than others, and therefore does more damage.
Cold, wintery weather didn’t help, either. I remember other Mum’s assuring me that “it only last for a few weeks, then they’ll toughen up and you’ll be fine”, but when you’re feeding every 2.5 – 3 hours, a few weeks sounds like an eternity!! Was very tempted to pack it in, especially during a couple of nightmarish episodes when I was up feeding him in the night and he spewed up dark pink milk – ugh!! Horrible.
Life savers were: Controlling the length of his feeds (and giving him a dummy if he was still desperate to suck), lansinoh ointment, and these things called Mothers Mates that I’ve only ever seen in a chemist at Toowoomba. My sister-in-law bought them for me because they’d helped her to heal up in a similar situation. They’re just these round silicon encased gel pads that you wear in your bra to help your nipples heal between feeds. Don’t know how or why they help, BUT THEY DO.
Finally got healed up and had that first feed where I remembered “Oh yeah, breastfeeding can actually be very pleasant!” Hooray!!
Was tempted to wean him when he got teeth early, but ended up going until 14 months again.
With both my experiences of breast feeding, encouragement, advice and support were so important. I probably couldn’t have persisted without it.
There are certainly people for whom breastfeeding is genuinely not possible, and I’m so thankful to live in Australia where we have some great alternatives available. But when I hear women say “Yeah, I tried it and it didn’t feel right” or “I just couldn’t do it”, I feel like sometimes they’ve missed out due to false expectations and lack of help. Because really, it DOESN’T feel right at first, and it usually IS painful and awkward. But if you can get past that – mate! It’s perfectly suited to your baby’s needs, it’s free, it’s on tap wherever you go, doesn’t require special preparation, and instead of hurting it actually feels really pleasant (in a very non-sexual way, let me clarify!).
So if you’re able to do it – sooo worth it.
Merryn
Well written Aly! Great to read your story. xxx Miss you
Aly
P.S. Smitch – really hope everything happens more easily for you with number 4. Amazing perseverance!
Merryn
LACTATION BISCUITS
Here is my cousin’s recipe for lactation biscuits. I have NO idea if they work or not because my supply is always fine, the concept seems a bit weird to me but I eat them because my mum made me make them at first and now I just find them yummy (and the ‘lactation’ bit makes them seem like a ‘good’ treat.
250g butter
chocolate chips (I like dark with this recipe)
1 cup brown sugar
½ cup caster sugar
2 large eggs
4 Tbsp water
2 Tbsp ground linseed (try health food store)
1 tsp vanilla
3 cups rolled oats
2 cups plain flour
2 Tbsp brewers yeast (found this at health food store too)
1 tsp baking powder
½ cup ground almonds
1 tsp salt
1 cup (or more
Mix the linseed in the water and set aside.
Heat oven to 180ºC
Cream butter and sugars together. Add the eggs and beat well. Stir in the linseed mixture and vanilla and beat until blended. Add the dry ingredients and chocolate chips.
Bake on trays lines with baking paper 10-12 min or until golden and crispy.
Makes 40-50 biscuits.
Aly
Ha ha ha! What a strange concept?! Still, sound quite yummy.
Katrina Roe
Interested to see the yeast ingredient. My mother was always told to have a beer at 5 o clock in the evening to make more milk. A couple of times I had a light beer and it did seem to boost my supply. Either that, or it was a placebo effect from being more relaxed!
kb1mdtanz
I can confirm the cookies boost supply – used them with both babies. It’s the yeast and linseed apparently.
Jennzy
Yeah yeast/beer is very good for milk production! Although the beer would make my babies spew so i would have the yeast instead! Interesting biscuit recipe! You’re full of info Merryn! Interesting reading your story Aly – reminded me that with my eldest she was on nipple shields for 17wks. The first 6 she needed to be coz i was also flat and she couldn’t grip on, but coz everyone was trying to make me put her on the boob i was so stressed, till one midwife said hey – she’s still drinking your milk – who cares! So i just left her on the shield for a long time coz the first 6 wks were so stressful. I tried at 17 wks one day when i was calm and she instantly attached and it was never painful! No. 2 more confident and tried after 6 wks (coz she also was unable to attach and on the shield) and she did it fine but was a strong sucker and it hurt like hell. The boy … didn’t need the shield – but like i said ripped me to shreds – like Tobin! I got interesting advice about that – the side with the hole in it – start feeding off that side first coz that’s their strongest suck – but I told Aly’s sis-in-law that and she said – both sides are like that
OUCH. It is so hard and horrid at first – great advice Aly saying it’s a naive expectation that all things are rosy and perfect. Doesn’t happen very much like what you expect. But that is reality really isn’t it??!!